Saturday, January 30, 2010
Crossroad
here i am, once again, at the exact spot in my mind and decision making matrix, behold the mental crossroad.
the lone street sign here says "side with him", "side with her", "be edwin and side no one", and "don't care".
and as usual, i take the route towards 'be edwin and side no one' . ha. i really am who i am eh. .
inside, i can already see the images of what could have exactly happened if i really got the two of them to talk things out right in front of me. and me mediating the situation. should i? i don't know. why should i? i don't know either.
knew him for 9 long years, seen this scene umpteen times. and lost a few friends umpteen times along the way. what more can i say? he's my friend. someone i'm proud to know of. or maybe, not so proud anymore... am i finally wavering? i guess so. someone has decided to bear my curse of being clouded by loyalty and righteouness, which can fail your sight towards so many things.
she was a new friend. but we'll prolly have to erase her soon. and she'll become the next hush hush topic. kinda sad huh? well, i've lived well with it.
thru so many times, so many replays, so many repeats then i realise the truth. not exactly the sharpest of minds i have right? prolly loyalty and righteousness have blinded me deep and long enough. getting rid of these two, have never felt better.
i see the light now. have u?
if u cannot make any sense out of what i'm rambling about, good. cuz its meant for only those who have seen the light in the situation. the countless repeats i've seen, so bad its enough for me to lose faith in my friend whom i'm referring to. sorry L, you are losing me soon.
we'll always be friends tho, we have been for the last few years. if you see this, don't get me wrong, remember, I side no one.
Posted at 10:28 PM